Think of your worst crush/worst break-up. What's the longest time it took you to get over someone you really really liked?
27 votes
A day
A week
A month
A few months
A year
A few years
Forever
I'm still not over them
I've never had this problem
other

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HeartOfAmethyst's avatar
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GrimStarling's avatar
I dated a guy who I was totally convinced was my soul mate. He was smart, he had great taste, he was funny, his friends became my friends... then I gained 10 lbs (gasp! a size 8?!) and he said he wasn't attracted to me anymore. I was CRUSHED. We were dating shy of a year, but even though the relationship was brief, every single relationship after had to go through being compared to what it was like dating him. I realized after a couple years that I was putting the thought of our relationship, this imagined, conjured picture of him on a pedestal, and that he was a good guy in some respect, but a shitty boyfriend. When I started dating Christian years ago, it became very clear that I had been "immortalizing" my ex, and that just because I had once loved him didn't mean there weren't other, frankly better, people out there for me. I just had to open my eyes and look, and stop comparing everything to him.

In the end, I'm now good friends with my ex, and Christian and he are friends as well. Because I was able to finally able to see him in an deflated way, both my ability to form new relationships and my self-esteem grew.